Mental Preparedness

Wednesday I got home from work, changed and headed out to my favorite path.  I started stretching and began dreading the scheduled eight mile run ahead of me.  I ran maybe 10 - 20 paces and hit a mental brick wall.  I almost stopped and went back to my car, but I pushed forward.  The entire run all I could think about was not wanting to be there.  Not wanting to be running.  Just wanting to be done and relaxing on the couch with a glass of wine. 

 

I slowly plodded along.  The voice in my head getting louder and louder...I don't want to be here.  I don't want to do this.  My body was fine - no pains, no aches - and ready to keep on moving forward.  My mind on the other hand had a completely different agenda. 

 

At the end of the two mile path, I fleetingly thought about continuing on and running maybe five miles.  It's an out and back path, no looping around...so whatever I run out, I have to run back.  Like I said, it was a fleeting thought...and rather than continuing on, I, literally, raised my arms in the air and waved the rest of the run off.  Oh yeah, raised those arms right over my head and said F... it...turned around and started plodding back.  I say plod, because I mean plod.  No running...just plodding along...dreading ever step.  Like I said, my body was willing and able, but my mind was dragging me down.  I have to admit that I did pick up the pace for a short while thinking the quicker I got done, the quicker I could be sitting on the couch relaxing with a glass of wine.  Again, that didn't last too long and I was back to thinking that I didn't want to be there and just wanted the dang run to be over.

 

I almost felt like crying.  I am not the type of person to throw in the towel like that.  And that is exactly what I was doing...throwing in the towel.  I was pretty disgusted with myself after the run.  Mad that I could of gone on, but didn't.  Upset that I gave in to the negative thinking.

 

Perhaps I need to switch up my routes.  It's the same ole boring path day after day.  I really need to find another asphalt path...  My runs are going to get longer and longer during the week and I just can't see running the same freakin' path day after day after day...  That would be like running on a treadmill...running and not going anywhere...like a gerbil in one of those habit-trail wheel ball thingies! ;P

 

Training your body is one thing.  Being mentally prepared for the consistent, routine, daily training...well, that is quite another.  Looks like I need to work on my mental toughness...believe and have have faith.

 

And I do...

 

I believe and have faith that I can do this!