125 Minutes

That's how long it took to run 11.08 miles today...

The plan was to run 10 miles today in training for the marathon. I've never ran 10 miles and I was a little tentative about it when I started out. I was hoping for a call or text good luck from Paul...but I never got one.

Run, run, run...I ran down the road... Everytime I was feeling tired or discouraged, I would tell myself - "you're a marathon runner, you can do it!" Apparently it worked! ;)

I stopped to get some water around mile 4 - in and out of the rest stop on the road. Mile 5 seemed to go on forever... I stopped at mile 6 and mile 8 for some water, too. I walked maybe a minute or two around mile 8 (which turned out to be mile 9)...

When I got to end of 10 and saw it took me 125 minutes I was a bit discouraged...12 minute 30 second miles...bah!

I got home and mapped the run...turns out instead of 10 it was 11.08 miles! 11 minute 17 second miles are a bit easier to swallow! :)

125 minutes...

That's the amount of time I had to contemplate my current relationship...

A couple posts back I said how I wasn't sure how long I was willing to wait for Paul to catch up... A lot went through my mind today. It hasn't been all rosey as of late...and I haven't really written about it because a part of me thinks that Paul may still be reading this and I've been trying to keep our personal life off the blog. But I can't help but write tonight because I keep feeling like he is pulling away and I can't help but feel like I'm some sort of after thought....there's the kids, work, softbalf, golf, the house...and then there's me. I just feel very unsettled about things...

Here it is 9:30 pm and not a single peep from him today.... I know he has a signal because he texted me last night. It's very disappointing to me. He knows how important communication is to me. And I'm tired of making excuses for him about being busy or wrapped up in the kids or the house or whatever. It takes two minutes to text and just as long to call for a quick hello.

It's funny (okay, not really)...there is a pattern that keeps repeating... I get unhappy, we talk about things, he modifies his behavior to make me happy, then I start becoming unhappy because he starts reverting to his old behavior.

125 minutes...yup. :) and :(